raising their skinny arms to the stars in surrender/

i've seen some hands do so much, and my own sit there.
like they're entertaing the idea.

wanna slip off my eyes, now.

lightly gold, inside out.

i'm going to tell you like it is, so please take your seats. my fingers stick to these keys and my ears amidst the sound, following the frequency that my eyes get lost in. my head, it expands and shrinks, it's so heavy to ever get so hollow. the rest of me doesn't know how to support it. i fade in and out along side the verses, drizzling out my excuses silently while they run short and eventually run away because they're only excess- not a point making it's self. i look out these doors for something, i walk in those hallways observing, i sit on those steps waiting, i seek out these places in hopes of it, i look out the passanger window for it, i feel it when i wake in the mornings before the light splits through the doors. sometimes as i'm falling asleep in his bed, after i say "i'll sleep, and you watch." i find it when i sneak outside, in the back, covering myself up in something that's where no one else is. swimming inside the smoke, wandering eyes scanning over the places they could catch me- the tight corners, holes in the fence, where the gate ends, where the trees are gapped and bare. i lose it as quick as i touch it. i touch it as quick as i know i'm going to lose it. don't you just want to be bare, sometimes? spurts and spots of quick moments, you're just ready to shed the entire gig. spit it out and off. as soon as you take the first piece off, you pull it all back on. i don't know why i've told you some of those things. it was a slip up, we are strictly contained. not because we aren't allowed to be anything else, but...

well i don't know what "anything else" entails yet.



should i drink the whisky, do i take the time to drink the wine?
do i have time? do i have time..

and if that's a sin- father i have sinned.